Grief or major loss
Something ended and you don't know who you are now.
Grief is not a problem to solve. It is a process that has its own requirements — and resisting it is more costly than entering it.
Loss takes more forms than we name. A job. A relationship. An identity. A version of yourself that a particular chapter required — and that did not survive the ending. Any of these can produce grief, and grief has its own logic that does not respond well to being rushed.
Mirabai understood devotion as something that could survive loss — not unchanged, but intact in its essential nature. What she points to is the difference between being held by grief and being held in it. The first is paralysis. The second is the natural movement of mourning toward something on the other side.
The examined question with any major loss is not how to get over it. It is: what does this loss ask of me? What is it true that I am now? And what am I allowed to grieve that I have not let myself acknowledge yet?
What have you not let yourself feel yet about this?
Who are you now that this is gone — and is that entirely a loss?
What is the thing about this ending that you cannot say out loud?